Sunday, January 22, 2006

The One I Didn't Risk Jail For


The only picture I took today that did not absolutely stink. It's a mural of Waterplace Park in Providence. I did learn one thing, though, I've gotta get up earlier in the morning if I want to get the light right on a particular (different) building I've had my eye on. Today was a disaster of epic proportions in blown-out skies, mistaken identities, and risk of jail.

So I'm downtown today, feeling jaunty and brimming with what I think are great ideas. I'm doing my jaunty walk - the one with the bouncy step. Apparently that's what news photographers do, because I was hounded in Kennedy Plaza. From homeless man: "Are you a news photographer?" "No, sorry, just a hobbyist." He follows up, "But you look like a news photographer." Reminding myself that a personal goal is to do more Man On The Street shots this year, I ask him, "Can I take your picture, then?" He's horrified, "No way, Lady, I don't want to be on the news." Homeless man wanders off, out of camera range.

Disappointed, and no longer jaunty, I scowl at my tripod which is being finicky. Unnoticed by me, a crowd gathers. Now I've got a lady with ice skates hanging over her shoulder asking me, "What'cha taking pictures for?" I tell her, "Just testing out some concepts on this building." She moves closer, peering intently at my LCD screen, "What's so special about that building that it's going to be on the news?" At this point, the frown I can no longer hold back crosses my mind as well as my face. "Sorry, I'm not a news photographer - just pursuing a personal project today." She replies skeptically, "I don't know why you are being so secretive. After all, whatever you are doing is going to be the news anyway."

What is it with these people? So now I've got 20 shots of a building that really stink because the sky behind it is blown out, with a group of thrill seekers constantly walking in front of my shot because they think they will see themselves in the news.

Thinking that tomorrow is another day, I start driving home. I see 5 Jeeps in a line on the highway in front of me, with me being the 6th. What fun would it be to have a shot of that? Reach into the camera bag, fumble with On switch, break speed limit to get in place for a perfect composition, miss exit for home in the process, raise camera in front of me and snap the shutter. What the heck - I can't see -- spots in my eyes - Doh! The flash was on! Yep, super duper wattage bounce flash has just blinded me reflecting off the inside of the windshield. Review pic as I'm exiting highway to turn around...one bright white light-spot and several dirty specks. (Note to self: must wash Jeep before attempting this again.)

As I'm turning around for home, I see a huge pillar of smoke that looks like it could be a fire. No sirens. Could it be that I actually will get a shot for the news today? I gun the engine and head for the fire. Turns out it was just the RI Resource Recovery Center, which is some industrial plant. Nothing newsworthy here. Oh, but wait, what is that SUV over there? A cop? Not to worry - I'm just creeping along looking for a good camera angle of the plant. Wait - it's the environmental police? Yes, it would seem so. So I turn around again, thinking that I'll ask him if I can take a picture of him monitoring the emissions from the plant. Just for practice, you see, for the next time a stranger approaches. To my dismay, he passes me in the oncoming lane. Nooooo - I will not miss another photo opportunity today. I turn around - yes, again, in hot pursuit of the environmental police. Now I really am speeding, this is not good. Where in the world has Waldo gone? I look to the left, and then to the right, and then check the rear-view. No E-cop. At this point, I finally consider the wisdom of chasing down a cop. Mental rundown of friends able and willing to bail me out of jail, nope, nada. The only person I can realistically call to bail me out of jail today is my brother. Realizing that he wouldn't have time to drive the 14-15 hour roundtrip and still get back home in time for work, I do, at last, give up. This was my random act of kindness for all the audio-savvy radio listeners in central Maine; yes, your beloved morning music show will go on as scheduled.

And that is the longest story ever for why you only get a crap picture (of someone else's artwork, no less) today.

Sincerely yours,

A1275

3 comments:

Elizabeth Abbott said...

Wonderful story! :-) Even if it was distressing to be considered a "news guy", just think how well that speaks of your camera!! Though I have to admit that that many people staring over my shoulder would make me very nervous. Kudos to you for sticking it out!!

Kiyoko Gotanda said...

What a story!!!

Maybe try telling the people you work for the depratment of homeland security, you can't answer any questions, and if they know any better, they will stop pestering you ;)

In reality, it's amazing what people will do to get on the news. There will be many more photo-ops for you, too :)

mk said...

Oh wow, that's quite a story. I've had a few people ask me if I'm a professional photographer before but never quite so insistent that I was for the news.

Nice photo but it violates the literal artwork rule, sorry. :P